God has been teaching me about sin recently: the death and destruction it brings into our lives; the hidden current of pride and anger that's running through our hearts; and the true life and love our savior graciously pours out.
As I've seen more and more people around me get excited about following Christ, I've been bombarded by stories of what God is doing in other people's lives. Normally, this is something I would rejoice in. But while I've listened to these recent stories of God's goodness, memories of past misunderstands about Christianity have flooded my heart. Growing up I was told that after we accept Christ, we should have stories about how God has changed people's lives through us. As a result I made it a goal to share Christ with those around me. I understood the Gospel as something that we had so we could become good people, and as good people we would help other people "be good" too.
Although, God has revealed much more of His plan for me over the years, my heart is still tempted to see my relationship with Him as a checklist consisting of how many times I read my Bible, how often I share my faith, and the general respect I get of other Christians in the church. I not only want to quantify and qualify my relationship with Jesus, I also want to tell really encouraging stories of how God is using me. In short, I want my walk with Jesus to be about me. Deep in my heart, I believe that I am actually very important. I believe that I should be admired and praised. And I believe that I even harbor hidden anger in my heart toward God because He says that isn't true. He says that apart from Him, I can do nothing. All my good works and evangelism are meaningless - disgusting even, apart from Him. That, for me, is hard to swallow!
God has continued to challenge my heart on this topic of self-righteousness. This morning I was reading Psalm 106 where David gives a testimony of what God has done through Israel. How crazy is this: David hardly mentions anything good Israel has done for God! He doesn't talk about how many people are now following God because of Israel, or how many people now have a copy of the Torah. Instead, David describes the gradual downfall of God's people (people who experienced God's salvation), and I can't help but wonder what our story as modern American Christians would look like if someone told our testimony.
I know personally I can definitely relate to the Israelites. Here are a few highlights:
- First, they did not remember the kindness of God.
In the business of life, we often consider ourselves devoted if we remember God in general for a whole 20 minutes a day. How often do we really remember the goodness of God? How often do we worship Him?
- They did not wait for his counsel.
Sometimes its the simplest things we over look like listening to God. I know we might pray often and pour out our desires to God, but how often do we wait for His direction?
- They gave in to their cravings.
Think about today. Maybe this past week, how many times did you give into one of your cravings? I know that I hardly even think about what I'm craving before I've already consumed it!
- They exchanged their Glory for an image of a bull that eats grass.
This for me is TV. I could sit before the image of relationships, success, and beauty and worship for hours before I ever knew what hit me.
- They did not believe His promises.
You are free from the power of sin. God has a good plan for your life. He will satisfy all your desires. God will not let you be tempted beyond what you can handle. No matter where you turn, He will give you direction. God loves you with an undying love. He is the only thing that will ever really matter. Can you say that you fully believe Him?
- They grumbled.
Do I need to elaborate?
- They did not obey.
"Pray without ceasing," "Be holy as I AM holy." "Do nothing out of selfishness." "Consider others as more important than yourself." "Consider it a joy when you face trials of all kinds." "Flea from sexual immorality." "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and body."
- They adopted the customs of people who hated God.
Please forgive me if this sounds work based or counter-cultural, but how often do we let our lives conform to the pattern of those around us? How do live differently from other people? How are we set apart for Christ?
You might read this, and say, "Well, yeah, we all sin. I can't focus on my bad stuff." And you are right. But we can't forget the Holiness of God. Where there is sin, there is always punishment and suffering! After David describes the shortcomings of Israel. He says, "Therefore the LORD was angry with his people and abhorred his inheritance [remember these are followers of God]...Many times he delivered them, but they were bent on rebellion and they wasted away in their sin."
"Yet he took note of their distress when he heard their cry; for their sake he remembered his covenant and out of his great love he relented. He caused all who held them captive to show them mercy."
This is the message of salvation! This is what our story should be. We are utterly helpless! We are wasting away in our sin. But He saves us! We have forgotten Him, but He remembers us. His love covers all our sin! We are faithless, but He is faithful. He poured Himself out that we might live!
My story, to you today is not about how many people I am pursuing in Christ. It is not about how much time I spend in prayer and bible study. It's not even about how the Holy Spirit is refining my character. My story is about One thing - I am a sinner, saved from the destruction of my sin by the great love, mercy and grace of my King and Savior Jesus Christ!
'Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel,
from everlasting to everlasting.
Let all the people say, “Amen!”
Praise the LORD.'
